I Kinda Hate This

It's been a while since I've rambled through the blog app on my phone so here we go. 

I'm currently laying in bed watching "New Girl" on Netflix and trying to stay awake. 

I've been thinking a lot about the whole blogging thing lately. This has been basically my diary since before high school.

I've never been able to keep a real diary before because I never wrote in it. Recently I've been trying to write here but it hasn't been working. I don't feel like I can open up anymore. 

I'm scared of many things. Confessing my feelings is one of them. I would like to say I'm an open book but I'm not. 

If someone were to ask me a question, whether it be personal or otherwise, I will give them an honest answer. Absolutely. But when it's up to me to do the telling, I can't do it. 

I can't confide in the Internet. I'm a reserved person. I don't tell my secrets. I'm private. 

There's been a lot going on with me personally that not many people know about. It's not really anyone's business. 

I think what I'm trying to say is I don't say everything on here. I would like to be able to, but I can't. 

Also I haven't written anything in weeks. It's killing me. 

<3